30 Thoughts During Internship Applications

So this week I’ve been working on internship applications, partly because an internship in the professional publishing world is required for my major and partly because it sounds exciting and educational. And I discovered something: internship applications are difficult. You have to find a company, find out if they even have internships, find the application (not as easy as it sounds–try finding Scholastic’s; the webpage swears they have one–and if you find it, send me a link), fill out the application, make sure your resume and cover letter work–oh right, first you have to make a cover letter and resume….. Anyway, all that to say, you don’t get any immediate gratification unless you promise yourself coffee after you finish the applications. And even then, you have to keep telling yourself over and over, “I will not die if I don’t get an internship.” It’s not exactly reassuring.

  1. I don’t know anywhere to apply. Literally I don’t know a single publisher’s name.
  2. Too many options. I can never finish this many applications.
  3. And what if I apply for all of them and only the ones I don’t want to work for even answer my application?
  4. Ooh–New York City. This could be cool.
  5. Experience. Atmosphere. Rainy pavements under streetlights…Gatsby
  6. …also expensive rent. And loneliness. And stalkers in alleys.
  7. Wait, does that really happen? Maybe I watch too much TV.
  8. A resume–do I even have a resume? 
  9. Maybe one of these doesn’t require a resume…
  10. …crap. They all require resumes.panda
  11. I think I have one. From two years ago. When I needed a summer job.
  12. Nothing on my resume is relevant. Or current. Or interesting.
  13. But there’s a lot. How do I fit it on one page?
  14. Oh man–how am I gonna fit it on one page in a decade?
  15. Is it too late to change my major? Maybe I should go into…science. Medicine. Yeah. Doctors make good money, right?
  16. Ooooh this publishing house pays its interns!
  17. …and probably half the Western world is applying for it, huh?
  18. LONDON. I’ll apply to go to London.
  19. I wonder if you need a Visa to intern in London?
  20. ….snap. I need a Visa. How much does a Visa cost? Where do you even get a Visa?
  21. Is it lunch time yet?
  22. What on earth is a cover letter supposed to say?
  23. And what’s it supposed to cover anyway? These are all online applications.
  24. I’ve never heard of this publisher. I wonder if they’re legit.wart
  25. Might as well apply anyway. In case all the big ones reject me.
  26. But what if it’s a fake company? What if it’s a front for modern-day slave traders?
  27. I saw that on TV. Or read it on a blog. Or something. It’s a thing.
  28. Better apply anyway.
  29. But this is kinda exciting. Y’know. Publishing. Real professionals. Internships.
  30. If they all reject me, I think my mother still loves me. Probably.